Don’t Be Misunderstood – Make Communication Work for You

upturned swan

Effective Communication Coaching

The swan in the picture above has given up, no-one is listening to him, they don’t understand, does anyone even speak the same language? Sound familiar?
Learning to be more aware of the language patterns you use, and learning to really listen to the language patterns of others, is the first step to effective communication. Getting your point of view across, being listened to and understood, and avoiding misunderstanding what others are trying to communicate to you, can make a huge difference to your daily life and your relationships with family, friends and colleagues. To begin changing your world with life coaching, book a free consultation by emailing me at


Believe in Yourself -Confidence Coaching

Life Coaching Facebook page

I would really appreciate you liking and sharing the Unfold Your Wings life coaching, personal development and NLP Facebook page. I’m happy to share pages for you too. Thank you.

Ruth x

Experiences of recurrent miscarriage – the impact can be greater than just grief

Originally posted on Recurrent miscarriage:

Red rose recurrent miscarriage

This blog is a little different from the usual work I do with Unfold Your Wings, although it’s not too far removed, just a lot more specific and personal to me.  I have recently written a book (at the publishing stage now) on my experiences of recurrent miscarriage and the effect that it had on my life. I am hoping that others in similar situations will take some comfort from the shared experience and know that you will eventually get through.

I’m going to share some extracts from the book in the next few weeks but in the meantime, as the heading suggests, I wanted to give some acknowledgement to the fact that the effects of miscarriage are far more than simply grief at the loss of the baby.  Feelings can be guilt – feeling like you are to blame in some way, or questioning whether you caused it or…

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A Bit of Experimentation – Back to School

gingham heart artwork

So, I’ve decided to go back to school again. Okay so it’s not completely the first time since I was 16, I have been studying psychology, counselling and various therapy techniques for the past few years, but this is just for fun.  Last year I joined an art class at the local college (the same one my son attends, can you imagine the shame?) in the evenings.   I do a lot of fabric crafts already and have sold these as Little Scraps Crafts, and I also make crochet accessories and little bits and pieces just for myself and friends every winter (see below the crochet version of my pet rabbits), but drawing was only something I really got into whilst recovering from surgery last year.  More about the healing properties of creativity later. I found that I was fairly good at sketching, especially animals as I love them, but as soon as tried to add any colour it seemed to fall apart, hence the art class. The tutor was great and really encouraging and was a good opportunity to try out lots of different medium that I wouldn’t have tried otherwise (still don’t like pastels though). You can learn a lot from art books and video tutorials on the internet, and I still watch Youtube videos to get ideas and tips, there are some great ones out there and you can lose hours of your day watching people create and share their knowledge with you for free.

One of my friends mentioned an art textile class at a local school that she has been going to, so another creative friend and I signed up. Going back into an actual secondary school was a very strange feeling, but the class was great fun. I don’t think we will be creating any great works of art, it’s more about experimenting, which is loads of fun. This week we did tie-dying which I haven’t done for years. Just chatting with a group of like minded creatives whilst tying elastic bands around buttons inside fabric is very relaxing. I may have added far more buttons and elastic bands than I needed to as I was having so much fun just tying them. The results weren’t particularly impressive to be honest but it’s given me an idea of what works and what doesn’t ready for next week.

People join classes for all different reasons – to learn a new skill, gain confidence or to meet new people and expand their social circle. I really ito this with no agenda other than it seemed like a nice idea, which makes a change because most of my adult learning has been for career development or personal development. I have to say it’s been fun, two hours away from life just mucking around with fabric,  and I would recommend going back to school, especially for something that is just for pleasure, to anyone.

Please tell me about your experiences of adult learning or fun workshops.

Ruth x

Oh, I promised crochet bunnies -

crochet bunnies

Get positive – start by being grateful

Originally posted on Unfold Your Wings:


Being positive can be really hard when you feel like everything is going wrong or it’s ‘one thing after another’. If you can just manage one small positive act or thought then it really can begin to change how you feel, and each positive thought makes the next one just that little bit easier.

People facing huge crises in their lives will or course find it much more difficult, and understandably so, but all of us feel like everything is stacked against us from time to time, or have days where you just think ‘what’s the point’. You may even just be having ‘one of those days’.

The best way is to start small and be grateful for the small positive things in your day. The train was one time – yay! It didn’t rain while I walked the dog – yay! That headache I had when I went to…

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12 Steps to Goal Setting

Originally posted on Unfold Your Wings:


Here is some guidance from the forthcoming book. Of course, these are quite general and you will need to apply the principles to your own specific goals, with emphasis on some elements more than others depending on the individual.

1. Always set your goal in the positive – People tell me this one seems too simple but it is really important. You will find it much easier to focus on something positive rather than a negative thing that you want to leave behind. For example ‘Having a great new career’ is far more appealing for your mind to focus on than ‘leaving this dreadful job’. Similarly ‘being slimmer’ is a much more satisfying and easier to work towards than ‘giving up fattening food’. Very basic examples but you get the idea.

2.  Be specific – It’s virtually impossible to work towards something when you don’t know exactly what it is…

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Stay positive

Originally posted on Affirmations and Positive Thoughts:


Stay positive and good things will come to you

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Quotes and Affirmations


If you have read my ‘about’ page you will have seen that two if my passions are nature and creativity.  The other day whilst clearing out some of the hits and pieces that gradually build up on my hard drive, I was browsing through photos and realised what a great collection of nature photos I’ve built up. From pictures of birds on our garden feeders, more unusual creatures seen on walks, to woodlands and beautiful scenery.  So I ended up spending a couple of hours playing around with a photo editor and a collection of quotes, affirmations and Chinese proverbs. As you do!

I was pretty pleased with the results.  I’ve built up a collection of really powerful affirmations and quotes, on my own photos.  Very satisfying.  I’m going to continue to share these on the Unfold Your Wings website and my affirmations blog posts, and they are already circulating Facebook via the Unfold Your Wings facebook page (ahem, please ‘like’ and share). I’m also planning to print some as sets of cards to help clients stay focused and positive. 

Funny where clearing out your hard drive can take you.

Ruth x

Just Bloom!



A thought for people who are struggling with self esteem issues. Focus on your own strengths, beauty and achievements, you cannot be compared to others around you, you are unique.